Thoughts on the Treadmill: Part III

This is my third installment of the fantastic series "Thoughts on a treadmill". I know I have held all of you, my eager readers in suspense since the last one. Feel free to read the first one here and the second here.
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It started last night. I went to bed at 10p. It has been a long time since I went to bed at 10p. Generally it is more close to 11 or 12. Why I have no idea. Usually it is because of a dirty kitchen, full dishwasher, semi organized laundry pile and a bowl or two of ice cream. Bryers. Vanilla. And a book. But there I was at 10p in bed. Prayers said, house clean. Just the silence emanating from the toddler's room over the gentle hum of her fan and the busy day at the Club Larsen and the hubbs breathing evenly next to me. The perfect equation for a good nights rest.
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BEEP>BEEP>BEEEEEPPP! 
6:30 am already here. "I don't hear a toddler, I can still sleep" And then I remember. It's 6:30 am. Time to get up. Perfect Morning goal. Then to hit the treadmill/elliptical. Then get back in time to get everything done for the day before the day is over. These are my thoughts as I kiss the hubbs and head out the door.
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The work out center is always empty this early. So it is just me verse the machine. And my mind. This time I mount the elliptical with much on my mind. Mostly thoughts of why am I such a weirdo. That's not the right adjective. Maybe more like spaz or airhead or idiot. Yep, something along those lines. I wonder to myself how is it that I have made it to live 27 years. How is that the toddler will be almost two and that I still have a great marriage. Being me is hard. Its frustrating. Confusing.  My sister once visited my world inside my head. The hubbs once took that journey as well. I would say it it similar to Alice in Wonderland. Confused yet semi-organized chaos. And beautiful in its own way.
I move my legs and arms in rhythm and  feel the buzz of adrenaline and the beads of sweat form. This is how I feel mentally many time. I move. I work. I sweat. I toil. Sometimes the results are instant but most happen over the course of time. Like... realizing that if I don't write it down it won't get done. Realizing that if an event is not on my google calendar, my two wall calendars, my planner, and my phone, I will NOT be there. And then I wonder how is it that my Savior knows how I feel. I am pretty sure He had it together. I am pretty sure He never dropped the ball. But I know that He is also the one that can help me be more of an adult. To become more responsible.
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25 minutes pass. A few muscles to work out before I am no longer the solitary person in the space I am currently occupying.  Before I venture back into my mind completely. But now I have some new goals. And I realize that these new goals, new ideas that have been created over the last 25 minutes are the result of my desire to change and the influence of the Spirit. And so I go home. I kneel and say thanks to my Father in Heaven for helping me to become better. I am sure I will still be the Spaz that you know and love, but maybe I will be a little less absent minded. At least, those are the thoughts I had today on the treadmill.